About ZZZoo

人類よ、我こそはZZZoo星の地球管理局担当者である。実際には我々には名前という概念がないのだが、地球の者どもにはZZZoo様などと呼ばれているので、そう呼ばれるのは構わない。

ZZZoo星はM79星雲に属しており、地球から301万光年離れている。人類がよく知っているウルトラマンとやらは、M78星雲なのでちょうど隣なのだが、それでも一万光年の距離があるのだ。"Space, the final frontier. These are the voyages of the starship Enterprise. It's five year mission, to explore strange new worlds, to seek out new life and new civilizations, to boldly go where no man has gone before..." などと、どこかのTVドラマでやっているが、ハッキリ言って人類が開拓するスペースなど、宇宙には何処にも残っておらんのだ！ワーッハハハ！

今、宇宙は猛烈な勢いで膨張しておる。何故だかわかるか？知的生命体の個体数の分だけ、思考するスペースが必要になるから、宇宙は膨張し続けているのだ。知的生命体の個体数が全宇宙から減少すると、この宇宙も縮小に転ずる。どうだ、わかるか？人類にはちと難しいかも知れんのう。ハッハッハッハ！

これからお前たち人類に我がZZZoo星に太古より伝わる全宇宙の秘密を提示してやろう。地球時間だと二万年かかるが、幸いお前たちがZZZooの音楽を聴いている間だけは、地球時間から離脱しておる。安心して受け止めるがよい。ハッハッハッハハハハハハハハハハハハ！

ZZZoo 略歴

2018年12月某日、杉並区路上に隕石が落下。KAZIとDENが目撃。隕石からゾンビ化した若林一也が登場、杉並区の路上を歩いていた森川誠一郎と田畑満が遭遇、ほぼ同時刻、自宅で宅録に勤しんでいたヤマジカズヒデがZZZoo星からきたUFOによって最初に拉致。引き続きゾンビから逃れるために、盗難車に乗って逃走していた森川誠一郎と田畑満が拉致、既知の３人であったがZZZoo星地球管理局にバンド結成の命を受ける。紆余曲折して氷漬けになったゾンビに、KAZIとDENがお湯をかけ、ゾンビ解凍され若林一也に復帰。天空から巨大なUFOが杉並区に着陸、怪光線を発射し若林一也を媒体としてKAZIとDENにバンド結成の命を伝える。真空管状の飛行船に乗せられたヤマジカズヒデ、森川誠一郎、田畑満の３人が地球に帰還。かくしてZZZoo星人の完全なコントロール状態における、音楽の神秘を人類に伝えるべくZZZooが結成された。現在までに数種のスタジオ＆ライヴ・アルバムをリリース。詳しくはZZZooのBandcampを参照。

https://thezzzoo.bandcamp.com

以下はZZZoo星地球管理局の薫陶を受ける以前の所属バンド名を記したメンバー・リスト。

ZZZoo : 

ヤマジカズヒデ g from dip, YAPOOS

森川誠一郎 b & vo from 血と雫, Z.O.A

田畑満 g & vo from 20 Guilders ex. Boredoms, ex. AMT, Zeni Geva

若林一也 sax from THE FOOLS

DEN per from BACTERIA ghettos

KAZI ds from REDЯUM, Shinya Oe & Super Birds

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Greeting, people of Earth.

This is a message from representatives of the ZZZoo Office of Interplanetary Outreach.

We have long since evolved beyond such need of “names”.

But you may call us “ZZZoo”.

Planet ZZZoo is found in the M79 Nebula, 3.1 million light years from Earth.

You may be familiar with a neighboring cluster, M78, as the homeworld of your TV’s Ultraman.

This is, unfortunately, 10,000 light years away.  

Surely you recall the broadcast:

"Space, the final frontier. These are the voyages of the starship Enterprise. Its five year mission, to explore strange new worlds, to seek out new life and new civilizations, to boldly go where no man has gone before..."

But in truth, there are no such new worlds left!

Hahahaha!

As we speak, the universe is expanding at a tremendous rate.

Why, you ask?

The more intelligent lifeforms spring up in the galaxy,

the further they expand their minds,

and the more the universe stretches to fit.

Put that in reverse.

Reduce the number of intelligent lifeforms, let their minds shrink,

and the universe will shrink right back down.

Humans, are you following?

Hahahaha!

We will now reveal the secret teachings passed down across the ages of our homeworld, Planet ZZZoo.

This would typically take 20 thousand of your Earth years.

Fortunately, ZZZoo music will take you outside space-time.

So sit back and enjoy.

Hahahahaha!!

The Chronicles of ZZZoo

In December of 2018, KAZI and DEN witnessed a meteorite crash in suburban Tokyo.

A zombified Kazuya Wakabayashi crawled out from the meteorite and wandered the streets of Suginami, where he encountered Seiichiro Morikawa and Mitsuru Tabata.

Meanwhile, Yamaji Kazuhide was abducted from his home recording studio by a UFO from Planet ZZZoo.

Seiichiro Morikawa and Mitsuru Tabata were soon abducted from the car they hotwired in an attempt to flee the zombification.

Once on board the UFO, the three friends were instructed on the orders of the ZZZoo Office of Interplanetary Outreach to start a band.

After many trials, KAZI and DEN were able to use hot water to melt the zombie curse on Kazuya Wakabayashi and restore him to life.

The enormous UFO appeared in the sky above Suginami, zapping the three with a laser beam and tasking them with joining the band.

With that, the vacuum airship returned Seiichiro Morikawa and Mitsuru Tabata and Kazuhide Yamaji to Earth.

Now under the complete control of the alien beings, the humans formed ZZZoo to reveal the secret teachings of to mankind through music.

For more details on studio and live recording releases, see the

https://thezzzoo.bandcamp.com

The ZZZoo Office of Interplanetary Outreach has designated the following humans as band members:

ZZZoo :

Kazuhide Yamaji - g from dip, YAPOOS

Seiichiro Morikawa - b & vo from Chi to Shizuku, Z.O.A

Mitsuru Tabata - g & vo from 20 Guilders ex. Boredoms, ex. AMT, Zeni Geva

Kazuya Wakabayashi - sax from THE FOOLS

DEN - per from BACTERIA ghettos

KAZI - ds from REDЯUM, Shinya Oe & Super Birds